Why are ninja farts so dangerous?
They’re silent but deadly.
Why was the nose sad?
Because it didn’t get picked.
How do you tell one end of a worm from the other?
Put it in a bowl of flour and wait for it to fart.
What’s the difference between broccoli and boogers?
Kids don’t eat broccoli.
A dung beetle walks into a restaurant and says:
“Excuse me, is this stool taken?”
Why should you never fart on an elevator?
Because it’s wrong on so many levels.
How do you tell the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The taste.
Why did Tigger go into the bathroom?
He was looking for Pooh.
What do you get if you eat beans with onions?
Tear gas.
What did one booger say to the other?
You think you’re funny, but you’re snot.
Why did the detective look up the nose?
He was looking for fingerprints.
Have you seen the new movie, “Constipated?”
No? That’s because it hasn’t come out yet.
Why did the constipated accountant lose his job?
Because he couldn’t budge-it.
Why did the skeleton burp?
Because it didn’t have the guts to fart.
Poop jokes aren’t my favorite jokes.
But they’re a solid number two.
What’s invisible and smells like carrots?
Bunny farts.
An old married couple is in church one Sunday.
Suddenly, the old woman turns to her husband and says,
“I’ve just let out a really long, silent fart. What should I do?”
The husband turned to her and says:
“Replace the battery in your hearing aid.”
What drives out of your nose at 150 mph?
A Lambogreeny.
